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my heart

I posted this update on FB and Instagram but wanted to share something here as well. Things took a turn for the worse. Buddy’s platelet count is 1 (normal is 150-400) and
his red blood cell count has dropped. I’ve asked if we should continue
treatment because I will never selfishly put him through anything and
the doctor said he could still turn around. We are doing one more treatment and
a blood transfusion today and praying his numbers go up tomorrow.

He’s only
been there for 48 hours and it can take 3-5 days to see a change, so if he’s the same or better tomorrow, that’s a good thing. And it’s soul shattering to write these words, but if he’s worse tomorrow, my sweet sweet boy likely won’t make it. But I cannot go there. I won’t. I just
really wasn’t expecting things to get worse and am having so much trouble processing any of this. He isn’t in pain and still
wags his little tail, but my heart is broken. I am terrified that I might lose my boy. They’ve seen dogs worse than this turn around, but things aren’t good. I can’t believe this is happening. I feel so helpless.

I don’t
know how to do my life without this boy. He HAS to be ok. Thank you all
for your love, support, and prayers. It means the world to me. Please
pray that buddy will continue to feel ok and that his numbers will be up
tomorrow. Even if they’re up a little bit, that’s something.

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